Usher Kisses and Tells In Equally Glorious Measure

Wow. Look what we have here kids. It's that R & B sex machine Usher laying down "Good Kisser" a jam in which those funky '70s meet Broadway tarted up glitter. I get tingles when I hear someone take a commonplace topic like kissing and give it that like new whiteness. it certainly doesn't hurt that he has both a shit kicking five step drummer and Stevie Wonder league bassist backing him up. Here's the prime example of a done to death instrument gaining new life pretty much because of the novel position it has in the song. Usher gets us excited as he talks about how his lips have been pressed along the lips of many a fine looking female specimen in his day. BA-DA-DA-DA-BUMP. BA-DA-DA-DA-BUMP. Excuse me for that need to succumb to an eargasm. Arrest those guys for lethal ear wig in the first degree. Let's suppose Usher was a competitive springboard diver instead of a thick slab of ebony sweetness. That drum/bass one two punch I brought up moments ago? It gives Usher more bounce off the diving board which enables him to land, splash free as any quality competitive diver can tell you into a kiss convincing call to drop them trousers, roll under them sheets and pass the kiss level of close by a pretty sizable margin. I already was putty in his hands from the second he came slinking into the video. Trust me, you wouldn't necessarily expect the hubba hubba heartthrob antics based on the first five to ten seconds. Agreeable but not even close to high octane at that point. Then, Usher Raymond flicks on the switch. The longer it goes, the greater his stamina appears to be. The chorus gains momentum. The playful free spiritedness reaches dizzying heights that make lonely gals ask: "Where has this breed of specimen been all my life. You can sense Usher's having a ball being the center of attention. Lean in closer if you want to virtually taste the sweat coming off the screen. Whatever the female equivalent of a "woodie" is you can bet lots of gals would be prone to lean that way. The man's not even spread eagle on top of them and already the orgasm's set to "I can't believe this is actually happening." Usher's lady kisses like no another. Literally hers is a million dollar smooch. She fucks his mind? What about how shamelessly (in a favorable way of course) he essentially fucks every female in the listening audience who is within a five hundred mile radius. That bassist deserves sainthood status for his work on this track. BA-DA-DA-DA-BUMP. We can only hope that yes, he does kiss his mother with that mouth. No man can pull off something monumental all by himself. Since we're in the 1970s area code why not ask The Village People? Takes the village to get junior off to the YMCA right? Usher's drum/bass "villagers" pour it on with the thickness of freshly tapped maple syrup. Keys also make up a portion of the magic rabbits pulled out of this particular hat. If Usher's femme fatale doesn't get how much of a value-based item her pucker pouches are then she likely couldn't entertain a thought if ready access to a beer keg or set of wine flights were right in front of her nose. Her kiss makes Usher consider retirement. In other words, after this kiss prospects on the female front only get worse. Nowhere to go but down.I confess "starin' at your barrel" has me thinking Mason Dixon line portion of the anatomy but it's my bad for leaving my thoughts unattended in the gutter. Have the state declare me an unfit father and throw away the key to my jail cell why dont'cha. Usher's nowhere near that classless. The visuals are always launched with high flattery in mind. Spin the wheel and highbrow praise is everywhere. She pulls it out and opens fire. Is that anything like when the late, great, albeit in his later years weird, Michael Jackson called Billie Jean's mouth a motor in "Wanna Be Startin' Somethin'"? Again, something to ponder if only briefly. Need a tour of foreign currency. Verse 2 goes globetrotting in impressive fashion. Dinero, euros, francs, and yen get a turn in Usher's lip lock. Who but Usher could pull off a line like "Pull the trigger, chitty, chitty, bang, babe". Up on classic family cinema and randy as the day is long. Usher's talents, sexual, spiritual, lyrical, conceptual, and intellectual know no limits from what "Good Kisser" is putting on the table. No drop in stamina for this guy. Usher succeeds in making the classic kiss look like he invented the wheel. Usher owns the patent. Anyone who follows can't possibly expect to measure up. Usher's kiss 'n' cavort escapade tells tales you'd need a month of Sundays to become even remotely sick. Extra special delivery indeed.