Beyonce's "7/11" A Triumph Of Convenience Over Substance

Queen Bey hasn't treated her royal subjects to anything worthy of a regal salute this go 'round. "7/11" sounds like some cheap processed food item you'd purchase at a 7/11. Sure, you get to watch Beyonce frolic all over the damn place in the video, lucky break for us but, was this really worth the presumed effort? I say presumed because you'll have to excuse me for thinking Beyonce's coasting on her brand name here. Too common in urban songs these days is the stutter beat vocal. You catch the drift? Where she...talkas...ifshe...hasan...implant...inher...voicebox (cue artificial drum samples). "Drunk In Love" showed us the sparkling romantic. "Singles Ladies (Put a Ring on It)" had balls out the yin yang. "Crazy In Love" brought the spice people have come to expect from her. "7/11" would be her version of phoning it in. Beyonce enthusiasts please hold back your righteous indignation. I don't deny she has mainstream audiences of all stripes eating out of the palm of her head. She's had that star quality from the first note. "7/11" is far from a prime example. Beyonce goes aerobic dance instructor has its meet cute moments, however it's annoying above all adjectives. For instance how many times can we "smack it in the air" before somebody starts to think "this nut's having motor coordination issues big time." Worn out from smacking it in the air. Beyonce's not done with you. Next, in order to get her approval you must "clap clap clap like you don't care." Personally I stopped caring about this dance move eons ago. Y'all couldn't have gone through life on this planet without having heard "Wave your hands in the care like you just don't care". It's Beyonce's gift wrapping but the overwrought call to action needs to be given a mercy killing. Beyonce shouldn't be allowed to use her corporate brand recognition as an excuse to reactivate a dance floor mood igniter that's been tread so many times it doesn't merit your shifting much cosmic energy in that direction. She does an awful lot of pointing out about how she's putting her foot up. Were either you or I to do that we'd be met with shrugs of indifference. But in the world we live in anything Beyonce does, no matter how pedestrian, has a thousand watt bulb on it constantly. She'd be doing herself a favor by reconnecting with better processed samples than what's on display in "7/11". Like the lyrics, laziness has the upper hand. Moving right along she gets excited about having her hands up, spinning her hands up, standing up with her hands up, etc...Okay. How does that sound like anything other than a low-fi workout tape's sequence of dialogue? The answer? It doesn't. One plus I glean from the video. It captures the queen's inability to stay in one place for long. Perpetual motion and Beyonce go together and I suspect always will. Nobody's demanding she give us a Destiny's Child update but she's more of a professional than this. A little flash would help things noticeably. "7/11" needs not be a stop on your musical itinerary. You've got more engrossing pursuits to entertain.