Lil Jon's Turn Down Service Not Worth The Effort

It takes a lot to render me speechless. The world demands you respond to something that you see or else risk becoming a non-factor altogether. Lil Jon has managed to unleash a curiosity (If you're a cartoon fan think Cheese from Foster's Home For Imaginary Friends or, for you classic cartoon lovers, Taz from the Bugs Bunny Road Runner Show). The song's handle is "Turn Down For What". It's already left a crunk rap scar along my easily agitated heart because that title is misleading. If you were to mention the words "turn down" to me, I'd be thinking fancy hotel, satin sheets, your basic Westin grand prize package. What we get here is Jon rapping not much else besides "turn down for what". What's the token novelty verbiage in this crock pot of quizzical? "Ball and out. Let the body shots". Huh? What...in the name of anyone familiar with the English language...does that even mean? As this blog space has already hinted at, I'm not a huge fan of the "direction" rap has taken in the 2010s. So we're going with the backup strategy of minimalist entertainment, less bounce to the ounce (Sorry, Roger Troutman, I'm not trying to desecrate your memory. You might even find the comparison funny). The assisting artiste here is one DJ Snake. I clearly recall Jon's "Snap Ya Fingers" bubbling up with these intriguing, cute little organ harmonies. As for this snake...is it on crack? Should the people behind Slumdog Millionaire think they just got a collective slap to their national face? Late in this game the snake gets "scratch factored". This is perfectly fine if you're a scratch DJ, which one supposes Snake is. The starting point is all "building....building...building to a big climactic wellspring of artistic genius...only it doesn't. You bought the musical meal, unwrapped it, were fully expecting to dine heartily on raw meat but someone in the kitchen forgot to cook it for long enough. Yikes!!! Thank you Mr. Lil and Mr. Snake for not dragging this "bold statement" out for longer than three and a half minutes. Am I to believe my standards for quality entertainment have gotten way too high or have the nation's standards gone lower than a pair of Hanes Her Way after a night of particularly strenuous sex? BEEP BEE-BEEP-BEEP..INTENSE DRUM LEAD-IN..."Turn down for what!" To be followed by the three degrees of Snake oil salesmanship. I'm nostalgic for "Snap Ya' Fingers". At least there Jon had more lines to say. Here he's making an appearance in cameo form only. I'm scared this has made it to the Billboard Top 40. I'm even more afraid of the lowest common denominator audience that's cleaving this close to its bosom. Yes, the snake effects are attention grabbers but only because Jon's attempts at vulgar displays of power have been rendered muzzled for the most part. "Turn Down For What" is rap's new reason for asking "This song is meant to amuse who?" If and when you find an answer please let me know. I'm itching for the enlightenment.